Thursday, September 1, 2011

Bubble Bubble, NO Toil and Trouble with Yoga

I really couldn’t believe my eyes when I ran across this EOB statement from my father’s health care provider. Yep, promoting yoga to reduce anxiety, improve strength and flexibility, and increase your muscle tone and circulation...and a number to call! You see, I don’t get too many medical bills at my house because we are pretty darn healthy, so if yoga has been promoted on health insurance statements and bills, it is news to me.  I use old remedies, holistic solutions and a lot of preventive health measures to keep us out of the doctor's office. My family has called me the ‘witch doctor” on several occasions, and I will likely be dubbed ‘the witch doctor grandma” by any future in-laws. 
If this yogi witch could cast any spells, I would take my craft and head north, circling my broom over those folks ‘on the hill’ in D.C. If the government wants to provide healthcare to it’s citizens, let’s get this thing right! Transforming myself into a fly on the wall, I would buzz around the hearings, casting spells of holistic health enlightenment. For instance: Let’s give reductions in premiums to those who are pursuing healthy ways to live and pre-tax flexible spending accounts for gym memberships, yoga and pilates studios, etc. More importantly, alternative medicine should be covered as a primary care provider medical visit. 
Then I would concoct a special brew (disguised as a swanky craft brew) and distilled spirits (Tennessee moonshine with a witchy twist) and serve it up at a tony D.C. party where the guest list includes all the lobbyists and executives from big pharma. The cocktails would render them all mute -unable to speak out, bribe, vote, etc., against these revolutionary acts until they are passed. After all, they are the biggest losers in America becoming healthy, relaxed, and happy. It wouldn’t be fair to leave big pharma in an eternal state of silence (although, it would be quite nice to get rid of all those TV ads), so the spell would be broken when each of the lobbyists and executives attend their first yoga class.
Hmmm...if the plan works, I would take on the ‘market’. Anyone have the address for United Healthcare?
Happy Fall Y’all!


  1. Nice post!! Thanks for putting a smile on my face this morning!! :)

  2. You are so welcome! Enjoy your holiday weekend ;) and thank you for reading.